Part of this week's reading is A Field Guide for the Hero's Journey. I love this book. One of the chapters is about meeting difficulties and learning from them, as well as the value of working hard. The book is a compilation of different inspirational stories, some true and some fables or fiction.
As I was reading the "Stones in the Road" chapter, I thought about a trip my daughter took in her early 20s. Emily had worked and saved enough money to achieve a goal--backpacking Europe. Because none of her friends shared the same goal, she went by herself. She researched the hostel system and rail travel. She created a route to see all the countries she wanted to visit. She got the perfect backpack and a silk sleep sack to use in the hostel beds. She culled her wardrobe and bought what clothes she needed. She bought a one-way plane ticket to London, where she would begin. She was ready. She was prepared.
When Emily arrived in London, she was sick from the air flight. She embarrassingly vomited in public more than once. She found a hostel and made arrangements for the next week. She wasn't sure this was what she thought it would be. She discovered that the lower luggage racks on the trains were usually filled and she would have to heft her gear to the top racks. She is small in stature, so this was a challenge and she sometimes had to ask for help. As she faced new things, more than once she thought maybe she should just get that return ticket and come home. But she kept telling herself that she could do it and that it would all be worth it. About a month in to her trip, I met her in Italy. We took the train and she not only hefted her own gear, but mine into the upper racks. She understood the metro system perfectly. She had picked up a few words of Italian. She was a different person. Just before my week-long trip was over, she decided to make a detour from her scheduled trip to Greece. She wanted to see the Hagia Sofia and the ruins at Ephesus, so Turkey was inserted into her itinerary. This meant leaving me at the hotel and taking a 46-hour bus ride through many countries not very friendly to the United States. I can tell you that I've never prayed so hard in my life! Was this the same girl who was sick and unable to lift her luggage above her head in London two months earlier? She built not only physical muscles but mental and emotional ones, as well. By persevering, she became the world traveler she wanted to be. This would not be her last trip.
Emily finished up her trip on a Greek island, soaking up the sun and reflecting on what a fantastic experience she'd had and how she'd built courage and been changed forever. I am thankful she learned what she is made of, as it has helped her in becoming a wonderful wife and mother to our grandsons. She can help instill perseverance and a love of challenge in them.
Saturday, February 25, 2017
Friday, February 17, 2017
7 Habits
Our focus in class this week has been Mastery. Mastery over self seems to encompass the principles we studied. But more specifically, mastering self so that we can focus on passion.
Stephen R. Covey is always involved when mastery is discussed. Many years ago, when my now-husband, then-fiance, were dating, we read Covey's book Spiritual Roots of Human Relations aloud together, alternating paragraphs. It was a great start to what would be our greatest passion--beginning a marriage and family. Covey resonated with me then, as he does now. I've previously read 7 Habits of Highly Effective People and embraced, to the best of my ability at the time, the principles within this book. Of the 7 habits, it is difficult to pull out just one to share. I'll pick two here....Habits 2 and 7.
Habit 2 is Begin with the End in Mind. I've always felt that an urge to plan for the future. This is a bit more than that. It is visualizing where you want to be and how you want it to feel. If you can do this successfully, you will make decisions that make a difference. When you see yourself as successful, whatever that means, all your choices are important and are just a bit easier to make.
Habit 7 is Sharpen the Saw. Sometimes when I am working in the kitchen, I will have trouble cutting with one of my knives. Then I realize it must be dull and I pull out the sharpener. We are no different. Sometimes, when participating in routine tasks, no matter how smart we are, we can't see that our skills are a little older, our communication is not as good as we'd like, we are farther away from God than we used to be or we are just out of shape. Everyone, no matter their level of understanding of communication and mastery, needs to be reinvigorated! This could be done through education, it could be going to a retreat or taking time out for family or faith. Now matter how clear and glistening water traveling downstream once was,if it pools and becomes stagnant it is of no value.
I personally find that focusing on learning new things helps me tremendously in all areas of my life, not simply the relatively few moments I am in the pages of a book or watching a talk or video. I am invigorated and reminded of the opportunities all around me.
Stephen R. Covey is always involved when mastery is discussed. Many years ago, when my now-husband, then-fiance, were dating, we read Covey's book Spiritual Roots of Human Relations aloud together, alternating paragraphs. It was a great start to what would be our greatest passion--beginning a marriage and family. Covey resonated with me then, as he does now. I've previously read 7 Habits of Highly Effective People and embraced, to the best of my ability at the time, the principles within this book. Of the 7 habits, it is difficult to pull out just one to share. I'll pick two here....Habits 2 and 7.
Habit 2 is Begin with the End in Mind. I've always felt that an urge to plan for the future. This is a bit more than that. It is visualizing where you want to be and how you want it to feel. If you can do this successfully, you will make decisions that make a difference. When you see yourself as successful, whatever that means, all your choices are important and are just a bit easier to make.
Habit 7 is Sharpen the Saw. Sometimes when I am working in the kitchen, I will have trouble cutting with one of my knives. Then I realize it must be dull and I pull out the sharpener. We are no different. Sometimes, when participating in routine tasks, no matter how smart we are, we can't see that our skills are a little older, our communication is not as good as we'd like, we are farther away from God than we used to be or we are just out of shape. Everyone, no matter their level of understanding of communication and mastery, needs to be reinvigorated! This could be done through education, it could be going to a retreat or taking time out for family or faith. Now matter how clear and glistening water traveling downstream once was,if it pools and becomes stagnant it is of no value.
I personally find that focusing on learning new things helps me tremendously in all areas of my life, not simply the relatively few moments I am in the pages of a book or watching a talk or video. I am invigorated and reminded of the opportunities all around me.
Saturday, February 11, 2017
Skill Building
One of the principles and ideas that caught my eye this week was using your career and job choices to help you fill gaps. If you pay attention, you can use your job choices to fill in areas of least experience. This got me thinking about my own choices in career and school and what I've learned and what I still need to learn.
My first job as a teenager was working for an OB/GYN as his medical assistant. Being just 17, I learned a lot of things about physiology that I had never known. I was asked to do things that were new to me and sometimes scared me. But I did them and I learned that I could do hard things. I learned to listen to directions and observe the unspoken things. I learned that some employers are very self-centered, having their own ideas of what is "best" or "right" which may not be in agreement with my own thoughts, but they were paying me and I needed to respect them. I really did learn a lot about the world of work in that little office.
I worked through a few short-term jobs in college and early in my marriage. I learned that I had the drive to do whatever it took to help myself and my family earn a living. Getting up at 4:00 in the morning to call substitute teachers was NOT a favorite, but I was proud of my strong sense of duty and my sticktoitiveness! While doing these jobs, I was learning about myself and what I was made of.
Once I went back to work full time, I attached myself to the world of education. I was lucky enough to work with people who believed in my skills and let me run with ideas of how to make things better. I have become a trainer, a manager and a business analyst, all in the same job. As those of us who are more mature often do, I have stayed in the same basic job for over 20 years, but am very happy with my opportunities for learning. I have built trusting relationships and earned a reputation for being smart and well organized.
As I look to the future, I am thrilled to be highly thought of and to have expanded my responsibilities. However, there are definitely areas in my work experience that are incomplete. I have very little experience in raising money. I know how to manage it, but I don't know how to get it. As I anticipate starting my own business, this will be quite important. I also have a need to learn more about marketing. Because I am so close to retirement, it is highly doubtful that I will change careers to fill those holes. I am very hopeful that these last 12 or so classes will help me fill them.
I see a bright future, well past my current employment. I am excited to get there and to, hopefully, have more tools in my belt when I do.
My first job as a teenager was working for an OB/GYN as his medical assistant. Being just 17, I learned a lot of things about physiology that I had never known. I was asked to do things that were new to me and sometimes scared me. But I did them and I learned that I could do hard things. I learned to listen to directions and observe the unspoken things. I learned that some employers are very self-centered, having their own ideas of what is "best" or "right" which may not be in agreement with my own thoughts, but they were paying me and I needed to respect them. I really did learn a lot about the world of work in that little office.
I worked through a few short-term jobs in college and early in my marriage. I learned that I had the drive to do whatever it took to help myself and my family earn a living. Getting up at 4:00 in the morning to call substitute teachers was NOT a favorite, but I was proud of my strong sense of duty and my sticktoitiveness! While doing these jobs, I was learning about myself and what I was made of.
Once I went back to work full time, I attached myself to the world of education. I was lucky enough to work with people who believed in my skills and let me run with ideas of how to make things better. I have become a trainer, a manager and a business analyst, all in the same job. As those of us who are more mature often do, I have stayed in the same basic job for over 20 years, but am very happy with my opportunities for learning. I have built trusting relationships and earned a reputation for being smart and well organized.
As I look to the future, I am thrilled to be highly thought of and to have expanded my responsibilities. However, there are definitely areas in my work experience that are incomplete. I have very little experience in raising money. I know how to manage it, but I don't know how to get it. As I anticipate starting my own business, this will be quite important. I also have a need to learn more about marketing. Because I am so close to retirement, it is highly doubtful that I will change careers to fill those holes. I am very hopeful that these last 12 or so classes will help me fill them.
I see a bright future, well past my current employment. I am excited to get there and to, hopefully, have more tools in my belt when I do.
Friday, February 3, 2017
A Hero's Journey
This week I watched a video of a talk given by Jeff Sandefer, one of the authors of "A Field Guide to the Hero's Journey," (as opposed to those on a fool's errand).
Mr. Sandefer is an amazing man. He is a brilliant man, educated with many others who have risen to high recognition in different fields of business.
One of the assignments given to Acton School of Business students is to interview role models, three of which must be over the age of 60. As one who is nearing that age in a few years. Those over 60 have all said things similar to the following three questions:
1. Have I contributed something meaningful?
This question relates to finding our passion. Never stopping that search. I feel that I can look back and witness my meaning in life and what I've contributed to. I have always shared my gifts and talents with others. If someone has needed assistance, or a meal, or a resource, a lesson, I have done all within my power to help them. Through this, I've developed skills of my own. Each time I've helped, I've learned something invaluable or built a bond. I've been the recipient of the kindness of others. It is often hard to put my hands on what my "passion" is. I think my passion is humankind. I think I am personally expanded by what I gain from reaching out to others. I hope that others would say I have contributed something meaningful to them. As I move forward, in an older age, I believe (or at least hope), that I can continue to develop and grow. I hope I can find new passions and use them for the good of others.
2. Am I a good person?
This pertains to setting moral boundaries. What are those things I will never do? What are those things I will ALWAYS do? Each of us must make those distinctions. I have set my own personal ethical guardrails based on the teachings of my parents and other family members, my husband's advice and guidance and the teachings of my church and religious leaders and heroes. We see many n the world who either never set up those guidelines or have stepped over them. This often comes slowly, small step by small step until they can no longer even see the line. I remember hearing a speaker talk about holding tightly onto the iron rod (a staple symbol in my religion, but I think others understand it, as well). Sometimes, people will slowly loosen their grasp, claiming, "I'm still holding on!" They they see the soft grass, next to the path and think, "I'll be more comfortable walking there. I can still hold one with one finger." Then they are not holding on, but justify it because they aren't far...they can still SEE the rod. Soon the are far way, thinking, "My friends and family are still holding on, I'm not far, I can run back any time." You know the rest of the story.
That first step away from our moral guidelines is critical. It takes great courage and often strength to make the decision NOT to step away, but this is what we'll see when we look back at the end of our lives. What was that moment of decision, how did I decide, and where did it lead me? Even now, I look back a lot. I look at where my decisions have led me--those good and bad. I know that I will continue to look back but always want to look forward to the ultimate place those things will lead. I want to be in the right place, at the right time, feeling joyous at those things that will lead me to exaltation.
3. Who did I love and who loved me?
Who we surround ourselves with is critical. I was once given the great advice that I should choose my friends wisely, that those around me will help me keep my covenants or will help me break them. There have been times in my life when I haven't chosen wisely. When I finally awoke to the real wisdom in this advice, my life got better. My choices to surround myself with a loving family and friends who were going in the direction I wanted to go have made all the difference. As I look forward to being with my deceased son and daughter across the veil, I am able to make better choices. I have been able to winnow down my life to those things that really matter. I know, personally, that the family is the essential building block of eternity and that the hugs of a grandson and the final clasp of a young adult son matter more than anything else in the world. I have learned the lesson of what matters most the hard way, but I think God that I have learned it.
So, as I head into the next 20 or 30 years, I believe there is much more to learn and do. I will keep these three questions in mind.
Mr. Sandefer is an amazing man. He is a brilliant man, educated with many others who have risen to high recognition in different fields of business.
One of the assignments given to Acton School of Business students is to interview role models, three of which must be over the age of 60. As one who is nearing that age in a few years. Those over 60 have all said things similar to the following three questions:
1. Have I contributed something meaningful?
This question relates to finding our passion. Never stopping that search. I feel that I can look back and witness my meaning in life and what I've contributed to. I have always shared my gifts and talents with others. If someone has needed assistance, or a meal, or a resource, a lesson, I have done all within my power to help them. Through this, I've developed skills of my own. Each time I've helped, I've learned something invaluable or built a bond. I've been the recipient of the kindness of others. It is often hard to put my hands on what my "passion" is. I think my passion is humankind. I think I am personally expanded by what I gain from reaching out to others. I hope that others would say I have contributed something meaningful to them. As I move forward, in an older age, I believe (or at least hope), that I can continue to develop and grow. I hope I can find new passions and use them for the good of others.
2. Am I a good person?
This pertains to setting moral boundaries. What are those things I will never do? What are those things I will ALWAYS do? Each of us must make those distinctions. I have set my own personal ethical guardrails based on the teachings of my parents and other family members, my husband's advice and guidance and the teachings of my church and religious leaders and heroes. We see many n the world who either never set up those guidelines or have stepped over them. This often comes slowly, small step by small step until they can no longer even see the line. I remember hearing a speaker talk about holding tightly onto the iron rod (a staple symbol in my religion, but I think others understand it, as well). Sometimes, people will slowly loosen their grasp, claiming, "I'm still holding on!" They they see the soft grass, next to the path and think, "I'll be more comfortable walking there. I can still hold one with one finger." Then they are not holding on, but justify it because they aren't far...they can still SEE the rod. Soon the are far way, thinking, "My friends and family are still holding on, I'm not far, I can run back any time." You know the rest of the story.
That first step away from our moral guidelines is critical. It takes great courage and often strength to make the decision NOT to step away, but this is what we'll see when we look back at the end of our lives. What was that moment of decision, how did I decide, and where did it lead me? Even now, I look back a lot. I look at where my decisions have led me--those good and bad. I know that I will continue to look back but always want to look forward to the ultimate place those things will lead. I want to be in the right place, at the right time, feeling joyous at those things that will lead me to exaltation.
3. Who did I love and who loved me?
Who we surround ourselves with is critical. I was once given the great advice that I should choose my friends wisely, that those around me will help me keep my covenants or will help me break them. There have been times in my life when I haven't chosen wisely. When I finally awoke to the real wisdom in this advice, my life got better. My choices to surround myself with a loving family and friends who were going in the direction I wanted to go have made all the difference. As I look forward to being with my deceased son and daughter across the veil, I am able to make better choices. I have been able to winnow down my life to those things that really matter. I know, personally, that the family is the essential building block of eternity and that the hugs of a grandson and the final clasp of a young adult son matter more than anything else in the world. I have learned the lesson of what matters most the hard way, but I think God that I have learned it.
So, as I head into the next 20 or 30 years, I believe there is much more to learn and do. I will keep these three questions in mind.
Friday, January 27, 2017
What am I Afraid of?
My business class assignments this week included one for figuring out not what we want to be but WHO we want to be at the end of the road. In the book, "The Ministry of Business," we learned about writing a personal constitution. We were to write it as if we were standing at the end of our life, having become the person we want to be. My first line is, "I see others as Christ sees them." It was a great process, thinking about the woman I want to be, looking back at my contributions and looking forward to living in eternity. It really did help me see what changes I need to make to get to that end. Eternal perspective is so important.
The other assignment which was quite meaningful was determining my fears. If one of my goals is to have a successful business, what is keeping me from doing it? Identifying my passion and my calling should help me feel that success is possible. But there are still fears. As I look at them, I see a lack of confidence as my greatest fear. I worry that I desire perfection way too much. What if? What if? Rather than focusing on what great things could happen, I focus on the worst case scenario. It feels like the answer for me is to get off the dime. I plan and plan, but forward movement is difficult. Because I am the main provider for my family, I fear that I won't be able to support myself, let alone my family.
From the time I was a child, I've had a deep yearning to own my own business and think I'll feel very disappointed in myself and my life if I reach the end and I've never really stepped out and done it!
I wish I had an answer... Perhaps by the time this course is over I'll have a clearer vision of my path.
The other assignment which was quite meaningful was determining my fears. If one of my goals is to have a successful business, what is keeping me from doing it? Identifying my passion and my calling should help me feel that success is possible. But there are still fears. As I look at them, I see a lack of confidence as my greatest fear. I worry that I desire perfection way too much. What if? What if? Rather than focusing on what great things could happen, I focus on the worst case scenario. It feels like the answer for me is to get off the dime. I plan and plan, but forward movement is difficult. Because I am the main provider for my family, I fear that I won't be able to support myself, let alone my family.
From the time I was a child, I've had a deep yearning to own my own business and think I'll feel very disappointed in myself and my life if I reach the end and I've never really stepped out and done it!
I wish I had an answer... Perhaps by the time this course is over I'll have a clearer vision of my path.
Saturday, January 21, 2017
A Lesson in Grace
Barbara Bush and Jenna Bush Hager. Nothing more to say--just read it.
http://time.com/4632036/bush-sisters-obama-sisters/
http://time.com/4632036/bush-sisters-obama-sisters/
The Formula and Happiness
Our lesson this week was how ethical behavior will serve us well in business. A video from the Launching Leaders series is what impacted me most this week. Jim Ritchie, the host of this series, shared information from two important people. J. Paul Getty, a renowned millionaire businessman, and Elder David B. Haight, a deceased apostle of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Ritchie put even more weight on his words because of his wisdom from an eternal perspective. J. Paul Getty's formula for success was:
Elder Haight's advice to Ritchie was:
While Ritchie found Getty's formula to be worthwhile for success, he chose to combine them into the perfect formula for not only success, but happiness as well:
Jim Ritchie then shared how this formula had enriched him life and the lives of his family. When speaking of his successful road, he consistently used the pronoun, "we." The "we" included his wife. The people I've admired in business have almost always been a team with their spouses. This impresses me.
As I begin this second chapter, I am looking at this formula for happiness and see that I've got a few parts of this down, but need to focus on others.
1. Get up early.
2. Work hard.
3. Find oil.
Elder Haight's advice to Ritchie was:
1. Get your education.
2. Make your mark.
3. Prepare to serve/Give back.
While Ritchie found Getty's formula to be worthwhile for success, he chose to combine them into the perfect formula for not only success, but happiness as well:
1. Get up early.
2. Work hard.
3. Get your education.
4. Find oil.
5. Make your mark.
6. Prepare to serve/Give back.
Jim Ritchie then shared how this formula had enriched him life and the lives of his family. When speaking of his successful road, he consistently used the pronoun, "we." The "we" included his wife. The people I've admired in business have almost always been a team with their spouses. This impresses me.
As I begin this second chapter, I am looking at this formula for happiness and see that I've got a few parts of this down, but need to focus on others.
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